Getting What You Want - Part 1

Happy November!

This month I’m taking you through thought exercises surrounding Goals and Commitments to help you gain clarity about what’s going on in your life. Stay tuned each week as I build on each concept and take it to the next level.

Today we are starting with Goals.

A Goal is an intention that has an end result.

Here are some examples:

"I want to start doing yoga."

"I want to try life coaching."

"I want to lose some excess weight."

"I want to feel better about my___________."  (Fill in the blank: self, life, relationship, work, etc.)

There are always things in your life that you either want to attain, start doing or stop doing. Think back to the New Year’s resolutions you made when the year was new and fresh. Ahhh there’s nothing like a new beginning! Some of those goals may not fit into your life anymore, but maybe you’re thinking of a few that you'd still include on your list for next year! Or maybe you crushed your NY resolutions and you’re further ahead than you were 309 days ago. Good job!

For the next week think about the goals you would like to achieve in your life or that are on your Bucket List. Write them down. Every single one, even if they seem impossible, but make you feel super excited. We will look at them again next week.

If you struggle coming up with goals it’s ok. Take a few minutes to sit, breathe and get calm. Think about the last time you were having a fun time. A time when you felt free and were laughing or just really feeling alive. Sit in those carefree feelings for a few minutes. Now try to write out your goals again. If you still have trouble repeat this visualization process until you come up with a couple goals you feel good about. 

 

Your Superpower

Think about one of your favorite songs from high school.

Sing some of the lyrics in your head or out loud. 

Really let yourself think about this song for about 60 seconds.

What memories come back when you think about this song? Who are you thinking of? What situation are you thinking of? What is the feeling in your body as you think of this song and the memories attached to it? Are you happy? Sad? Angry? Longing for when things were more simple? Glad that period of your life is over? Really dwell on the experience of remembering this song. 

One song from your past has the ability to completely take you into another world. Stories from your past cause you to feel a certain way just by recalling them even though they aren't actually happening anymore.

This experience is happening to you every day in your present situation as well, no song required. You have the power to conjure up certain feelings from stories you tell about your situation and get triggered by things that remind you of the past. You have so much power with your thoughts to create the reality of how you feel. This superpower can be used to move you forward, set you back or paralyze you from doing anything. 

When people come to me for coaching it's because they want to feel better in some area of their life. Things aren't working out and soon enough they feel even worse thinking about all the pain of their stories.  By the end of a session though, through the work that I do with them, these same people who feel like there might not be hope suddenly feel better. Life coaching is not magic but the process can feel pretty magical when we start to break through all the things no longer serving you. From that new creative place, you can move forward into better thoughts, stories and goals. If you're curious about this process please visit my website under Coaching Programs for options!

 

Simplify and Unsubscribe

I know people who literally have thousands of emails they’ve never opened on their server. I’ve witnessed the little red notification dots on phones signaling the number of ignored pieces of mail waiting to be paid attention to. I’ve heard many reasons and excuses why they can't or won’t clear these emails out. What is happening on a subconscious level though every time you see that little red number is some sort of thought such as, “ugh, I need to check those” or “there are tasks that I need to get to”. Of course, not every person notices or cares about these subconscious messages, but for those who have issues with anxiety or clutter this is something you absolutely have control over! Managing your Inbox creates space not just on your phone and computer, but also in your brain. After you respond to the important emails and immediately delete what is no use to you or unsubscribe from what doesn’t fit into your life anymore you are creating mindfulness in how you’re living. When you allow emails to pile up because you’re too overwhelmed to deal with them, you better believe that is also how you're handling things in other areas of your life such as relationships or your career. I invite you to reflect on this: Where else are you ignoring things or feeling too overwhelmed to give some much needed attention?

This particular email (or for some of you - post) may, in fact, be contributing to the clutter in your Inbox. My deep desire in life is to help you simplify by offering my service, knowledge and tools. Whether through a yoga class or a coaching session I want to help you feel better and decrease your stress caused by overwhelm, anxiety, crappy relationships and persistent negative feelings and emotions. With that in mind, if these emails are not helpful I give you full permission to unsubscribe and put your time into something else that mentally fills you with energy! This is a reminder to take charge of your life - Inbox or otherwise. If there's any way I can help you in this process please let me know! 

What's Your Type?

I've spent the last 10 days in New York at the Enneagram Institute for training to facilitate the work of the Enneagram. If you’ve never heard of it, the Enneagram is a personality test that I’ve used in my life for many years and also use as a tool in my life coaching business. The premise is that there are 9 personality types that display different ways the ego shows up in the world. Over the course of our lifetime we display all 9 types, but we bend towards one the majority of the time. Even though our main type does not change, with insight and practice we can grow and develop to become better versions of ourselves.

Each personality type is different, but there is one thing they all need for growth: Presence.

We need to be present to our body, our breath and our Spirit. We need to be present to our experience on this planet and how we show up in it. Presence allows us to become observers of our ego and call bullshit when it tries to lead us down a painful path.

I’d love to be a part of your journey and teach you how to be present and reduce your suffering whether it’s through the process of life coaching or a yoga class. For more information, visit my website to see my offerings and then drop me an email or a message so we can chat about the possibilities!

Taking Charge Of Your Sight - Visual And Otherwise...

In the past few years my eyesight has gradually gotten worse due to the wonderfully, unforgiving aging process. I used to only need glasses for night driving, but I pretty much need them for everything now. I’m not a fan of feeling frames on my face so for the most part I’ve resigned myself to walking around with everything visually slightly to moderately blurry. It’s not that I can’t see, it’s just that I miss things and have a low level of anxiety because I can’t see clearly. A month ago, I decided to give contact lenses a try and although it’s been a bit of a learning curve, I love being able to see clearly all the time with no contraption on my face! Everything around me seems brighter, energetic and more alive!

In a way, life coaching is like contact lenses. The life coaching process helps you see life more clearly instead of walking around feeling emotionally and mentally “blurry”. In the beginning, there is a learning curve and some effort as you learn how to use new tools, but the perspective and insight you gain help you handle your life and the people in it with more clarity. Many of us go about our life making do with things feeling “fine” or “ok”. The process of coaching strips away what is no longer working so you’re able to set new goals and move forward with newfound insight. As a life coach, I help hold you accountable to the growth process and achieve things you may not have previously been able to.

Most clients who come to me have struggles they are working through however, you don’t need to have major struggles in your life to benefit from coaching. If you learn the tools prior to negative events (for some, that would include the upcoming holidays) you will have time and space to care for yourself in a more positive way.

The Secret of Growth

 

“Growth is never by mere chance; it is the result of forces working together.” James Cash (J.C.) Penney

Seeing growth within the process of life coaching and yoga require the same two forces working together: your mind and your body. Quality thoughts and beliefs that serve you will support sustainable action in all areas of your life.

In life coaching, we take a look at your thoughts and set goals that your body puts into action. In yoga, we start with body and breath to see where your thoughts may be holding you back. If you are looking for change or growth in your life I am able to help you with both your mind AND your body! Email me for more information.

Change

"The secret of change is to focus all of your energy, not on fighting the old, but on building the new."  Socrates

I used to hate change. Well, I thought I did, and thoughts about things can be more stressful than the actual things. I thought happiness was finding a reliable, safe and structured way of living and then living it out for the rest of my life. My mind believed I was safe, but I was also bored, complacent and filled with fear about the future. My brain loved to think, "What if?" and "Yeah, but..." while my heart would whisper, "But there's so much more for you Jill." 

Through life coaching and yoga I no longer hate change. In fact, I embrace it and look forward to it. I'm thankful that my bad moods change to good. I'm thankful that I have contrast between the feeling of being in flow and when something feels off and I need to course correct. Change is how I am happier and more successful now than when I indulged in and lived out my fear based thoughts. Focusing on building the new may be scary, but holds more hope and excitement than fighting with and dwelling on a past you can't change.